Week 7

The more we know about it, the more we study the stars or the rocks or the whales or the volcanoes, the more we ought to praise God, summing up in articulate speech, the inarticulate praises of all creation (193)

There is nothing more humbling to me than to gaze into the sky on a dark clear night in the middle of a forest and see the vastness of a sky full of stars.  When I feel far from God, or overlooked, I like to sit and ponder this idea that the creator of the universe created me.  I love what Wright is saying here.  When we stop to see what God has created, we can't help but praise him.  It's like the amazing sunsets that we get here in AZ.  There are times where you just can't help but stand in awe of the beauty.  I know Wright says "we ought to praise God," but I think we can't help but praise Him when we take the time to take in His handiwork.

Maybe the challenge is taking the time to actually settle in enough to enjoy God's creation.  How often I find myself rushing here and there.  I get so wrapped up in my own thoughts that I forget to enjoy what God has given me.  Then my sweet little boy reminds me when he becomes enthralled with a lizard on the wall, a flower on a plant, or a stick in the grass.  Or my husband stops me and says come look at this sunset.  I am so thankful God has placed people in my life who help me to pause and savor these moments.  

Week 6

I am not sure if I agree or disagree with the statement Wright makes when he says, "To worship without using the Psalms is to risk planting seeds that will never take root." (165).  It is hard to argue against Wright.  The Psalms are amazing.  I think they belong in our services, but it feels like he is saying without them it is frivolous or shallow to do anything at all.  I see their value and sanctity but I do not think its all for not without them.  Perhaps I would feel differently if growing up the tradition of worship I knew was more reflective of his perspective.  My curiosity is definitely piqued at this point.  It would be fascinating to attend a service that reflected Wrights perspective on the Psalms.  Finding a service like this would be the difficulty I imagine.  

Yikes this is late: week 5

"That life is constantly praising its maker by being, particularly and peculiarly, what it is."  (pg. 120)

"The glory of God, said theologian Ireneus, is a human being fully alive." (pg. 135)

These two statements caught my eye this week.  In essence I think they are saying the same thing.  When I am who God created me to be, He is glorified.  I find a lot of freedom in this.  God created me in his image, yet I have my own unique quirks and characteristics that make me who I am.  God in his infinite wisdom designed me so that the more I become who He created me to be, the more He is honored.  I think maybe this is one of the reasons that people spend so much of their lives searching for who they really are.  One of the most tragic things for me growing up in the church has been seeing the people I looked up to and admired fall apart.  Perhaps this happens when people pursue what they want to be instead of who God made them to be.  Life is a work in progress, growing and learning more about myself is part of the process.  It isn't bad when I discover new things about myself, the problem is created when I step outside of what God has created in me.  The amazing thing that I love about all of this is:  the more I know God, the more I am able to see who he created me to be.  Growing closer to God, pursuing God unravels his intention for me.  I am allowed encouraged even to rest in who my creator made me to be.  To be at peace with who I am, I don't have to strive after who I think I should or could be, as long as I simply rest in His presence. Who God has created in me will rise to the surface.

This book is sometimes hard to read because it takes a lot of concentration and time, but I am enjoy learning how the Psalms are woven throughout the Bible.  It's a little intense trying to keep up, but it's pretty amazing that we have access to this amazing Word of God.  Not to mention all of the resources we have at our fingertips to further understand the Bible.  I can't imagine what life must be like for those who do not own a Bible.  It makes more sense to me why back in the day they spent so much time in the temple learning about and memorizing the Torah.  I forget how spoiled I am.  I would be clinging to every word if I wasn't able to just go back and read it again another day.  I need to live a little more like my life depends on this "good book" because in all actuality, my life does depend on these words.

week 4

Week 4

“And at the heart of that new land, we see not a sacred building of bricks and mortar but a sacred people, whose very hearts have become the dwelling place of the living God by his Spirit, enabling them to be conformed to “the model of the image of his son,” the one in whom the Psalms’ greatest promises have found their fulfillment.” (115)

As we have been reading through the Old Testament, I am reminded how powerful the God that we serve is.  I know this, but reading the stories of Moses, Noah and David opens my eyes once again to the astounding power of our God.  I wonder how the Israelites would respond to Wrights statement, “…we see not a sacred building of bricks and mortar but a sacred people, whose hearts have become the dwelling place of the living God by his Spirit…”  The awe and fear they felt toward God make me wonder if they might have been quite frightened by this idea.  When I think about this I realize how incredible it is that the God of the universe has made a way to reside in me.  We often use language like, “ask Jesus to come into your heart” but seldom if ever do I realize the weight of this statement.  The Almighty God not only knows me, knows my name, my place in life, but He has made a way for the Holy Spirit to reside in me.  This is hard to grasp and even more difficult to try to write about. 

How great my faith would be if on a daily basis I could sink into the place of knowing that the Holy Spirit dwells in me.  I can’t even begin to wrap my mind around this, but I do not doubt that I could truly move mountains if I walked daily in this truth.  What an incredible time of worship it would be if I could grasp this concept and lead worship from a place of truly understanding what this means.  I am so grateful that God allows me to grapple with these ideas as I attempt to live life in a way that is honoring to Him.  

Week 3

A few years ago my husband and I went to a Christmas party.  The host made his own plumb brandy.  Of course we couldn't pass the opportunity to sample a little moonshine.  This brandy was served in a shot glass, with the intention of it being sipped....slowly.  This stuff could keep you warm in the middle of the winter in the arctic.  Wright's writing reminds me of this brandy.  It is meant to be enjoyed slowly.  Sip by sip piece by piece. There is so much depth to these chapters.  I wish I had the time to read and re-read and read again these pages.  Such thought provoking and challenging words.  

"Make us, in other words, to be people who know how to stand at the threshold of human time and God's time, and there to learn both humility and hope." 

How do we learn to "know how to stand at the threshold of human time and God's time"?  In theory this sounds great.  To actually  learn this feels impossible.  Its the "tension of the now and the not yet" as we so often talk about in the Vineyard.  One of the reasons I love to be around people who have "been around" is because they teach me how to live in this tension.  I love that this is such a big part of our Vineyard roots.

Wright says "and there to learn both humility and hope."  These are the hard things.  We don't know them intuitively.  They seem to be learned most often in difficult and painful circumstances.  It reminds me once again that being a Christian is a process.  It's a slow sometimes painful process, but God's patience and grace with us never fails.  God is good.  He is always good.  

Week Two

"Sing these songs, and they will renew you from head to toe, from heart to mind.  Pray these poems, and they will sustain you on the long, hard but exhilarating road of Christian discipleship." (N.T. Wright pg 35)

"They will renew you from head to toe, from heart to mind"

How often I have found myself sitting at my piano singing old songs like I Lift My Eyes Up Psalm 121:1-2, and found refuge in the words.  Almost as if a restart button has been pushed.  Through songs like this, a cathartic experience happens where I can lay my burdens at the feet of my Father where true renewal is found.  I think something occurs when these sacred words are put to music.  My heart is more malleable when God speaks to me and I am more apt to listen during times of worship.  The words are more accessible to my memory when put to music as opposed to strict memorization.  When Wright speaks of renewal from heart to mind, it's as if the struggle between the two is put to rest.  These words wash over me, and my heart and mind are at peace with one another.  The things God stirs in my heart begin to transform my way of thinking.  I love that line.

“Pray these poems, and they will sustain you on the long, hard but exhilarating road of Christian discipleship."

With the gamut of emotions found in the Psalms, there is a passage to pray no matter the circumstances.  I find myself wanting to sink into the words Wright uses as he talks about how the Psalms will "sustain" me in my journey.  He says it’s going to be hard, it's going to be long, but it’s going to be exhilarating.  How reminiscent these words are to our talk with Adam Russell when he shared about ministry being a marathon.

Countless times I have read the Psalms and been surprised by the raw emotion wondering if the author crying out to God is sinning in His prayers.  I then find comfort in knowing that Christians have for ages battled this seesaw of emotions; at times feeling blessed beyond words, at times feeling fully abandoned by God.

In regards to worship, something in my own life that continues to amaze me is how quickly I can recall the melody of a song even from childhood; yet, I struggle immensely to memorize scripture.  What a gift to have passages, not just a verse, but an entire passage put to music and sung as a worship song.  These songs are literally putting the words of God on our hearts without it being realized.  It makes me want to seek these songs that are based on the passages of scripture out and use them in my sets.  As the day goes on, someone merely humming the tune of a worship song is actually quoting scripture.  What could be more helpful to those I have the opportunity to lead into worship?  This also inspires me to practice "writing" songs where the lyrics are straight from the Bible. Even if it only stays in the confines of my own home, and is a terrible song, the worst that could happen is I learn more scripture.

Just a side note, there are a few parts of Judges that seriously blew my mind.  Again and again I am dumbfounded by the justice of the Old Testament.

“This means, of course, that the Psalms were the hymnbook that Jesus and his 1^st followers would have known by heart.”  N.T. Wright

                I love the Psalms.  I love to read them, I love to meditate on them, and I love to find refuge in the depths of passages written ages ago.  Psalm 91 has brought me comfort more times than I can count.  I have prayed those words of protection over my husband time after time in the middle of the night as he patrols the streets of Phoenix, and I do my best to keep fear at bay.  I have read, said allowed, and whispered the words, Be still and know that I am God (Psalm 40:10), more times than I can count trying to remind myself to rest in His presence.  Psalm 139 reminds me often of how God knows me, He created me, and He sees where I have been and knows where I am going.  I found myself meditating on these scriptures often during both of my pregnancies.  Amazed by the words you created my inmost being; you knit me in my mother’s womb (Psalm 139:13).   The Psalms have played a powerful role in my relationship with God.

                It might sound crazy, but I forget that the Bible was such a big part of Jesus’ life.  When I think about that, when I really think about the fact that there are parts of the Bible that Jesus and the disciples memorized and recited it brings a whole new depth to the words I read.  How incredible it is that I get to read those words that shaped and formed some of the most famous Christians of all time.  N.T. Wright also talks about how the Psalms unite over time and culture (pg. 6).  When I read my Bible, sometimes it is selfish and self-focused.  I have never allowed the idea that for thousands of years people have been reading these same words resonate within.  I am truly in awe.  The more this idea sinks in, the more I feel so small yet so privileged to have these amazing words at my fingertips.  How profound this idea is that my Savior would have poured over these words that I love so much.  It’s hard for me to comprehend and harder still to express.

                One of the greatest experiences I have had learning about worship came when I visited my Uncle’s church.  The style of worship is very different from what is typical in a Vineyard church.  In this particular situation, I got to sit in on a “prophetic singing” teaching.  The session looked like this: a passage from Psalm was chosen prior to the teaching, there was a short time of instruction, after this the band played, and several vocalists waited until a melody came to one of them.  Then whoever felt they had a melody for this particular passage would sing it out.  It was amazing to hear and see the different songs come forth.  As I think back on this time, I realize how powerful the Psalms are.  I realize the place they have, and I am excited to look and see how I can incorporate them into my sets.