Solitude

                I love being alone.  It is such a rare thing for me at this point in life that it actually feels like a luxury.  While I love that I get to be home with my boys and I work very little outside of my home, a definite down side is no alone time.  Such is life with small kids.  When I saw this as our soul practice I got really excited.  Unfortunately I never got to have some time to myself.  I got a few minutes here and a few minutes there, but I never got a block of time. 

                I did learn how much I really look forward to time to alone.  I need this space, it renews and refreshes me.  I am a better person, I am more fully who God created me to be when I get time alone.  It takes a lot of work and planning but as time goes on I am realizing how much I need to prioritize this sacred space.

                As far as taking off the masks, I actually feel this is most accurate for me when it comes to worshiping in solitude.  I know that when we talk about solitude is usually means being alone and being quiet, but as I think about it, my most sincere worship comes when I am alone.  My favorite times are when I am home and I get to sit at my piano with no one else around and it’s just me and God.  There is no one to impress, to think about.  I don’t wonder if I seem sincere or look sincere.  I merely find my place at the feet of my Father and worship Him the way I was meant to worship.  The more time I get to spend in this type of worship, the more I understand what it is meant to look like.  That being said, I realize that I need to work on being quiet before God.  I guess maybe it's easier to feel like I have taken off my masks when I am worshiping because I have something to occupy my mind with.  As I think about this concept of being my true self before God, I see that I have some work to do.